pg. 100-151

In these 50 pages, Craig describes how his depression has got to the current point. He starts with his first doctor visit, to the next one, to the next one, to the next one, until he settles on his present one. Also in this chapter, Craig realizes that wanting to kill himself has become a major problem and he needs more help than what he is getting. He starts by calling the suicide hotline which direct him to little to no help except telling him to go to the nearest hospital and tell them about his suicidal desires. This action is what carries Craig throughout the book.
After Craig has one of his episodes where he eats and "that man tugs on the rope," Craig starts finalizing his suicide. He is going to get up early so he won't wake up anyone and throw himself off the bridge, but Craig doesn't want to go to sleep. So he starts doing push ups with his, weak malnourished body. It is then, after his exercises stop, that Craig realizes he wants to live. He doesn't want to die.
"Badoom. Badoom. Badoom.
My heart is ramming now. It's beating everywhere. It hits all the spots in my body, and I feel the blood pressuring through me, my wrists, my fingers, my neck. It wants to do this, to badoom away all the time. It;s such a silly little thing, the heart.
Badoom.
It feels good, the way it cleans me.
Badoom.
Screw it. I want  my heart.
I want my heart but my brain is acting up."
The mere fact that Craig makes this big of a breakthrough, is an amazing accomplishment. By the looks of it, what he has been through, has taken a toll on him more than anyone could possibly relate to.